reasons, seasons, lifetimes

I am not for forwarding emails. But Coco somehow in a way tagged me and challenged me to spread the material below. For what, I don't know. It's all in the dare I guess. So here goes.


People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real, but only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

Photo: "This Time and Tide" by This Girl

when the heart is full

January 4 1997
Sunday

It's a Sunday afternoon...
and as the post-Christmas sun blazes outside,
I sit on our bed
and contemplate on how blessed I am...
with my husband sleeping at my left...
and my baby daughter in her crib at my right...
perhaps nothing, almost nothing,
could get better than this.

As they both sleep,
I offer a silent prayer of praise and thanksgiving
to the Lord who made all this possible.

- a little note I found when cleaning out some old boxes

fly, mama fely, fly

“The closest bonds we will ever know are the bonds of grief. The deepest community is one of sorrow.” We are sad, yes indeed. But even in this time of sorrow, my family is grateful. And gratitude is a higher tribute than grief.

We are gathered this beautiful morning for Felicitas Tabil Mendoza. Each one of us is here because somehow, in one way or another, she has touched our lives. And to us her family, she was and will always be a beloved wife, mother and grandmother. We are so proud of her being our mother. And we ask ourselves - How did we get so lucky?

Mom's beginnings were modest. It all started 69 years ago, in a small barrio called Macabayao, Misamis Occidental. Born to Crisanta and Marcos Tabil, she was named Felicitas, meaning happiness in Spanish. My mother belonged to a brood of seven children, and she was the second to the youngest.

Mom and her sisters, Aunt Lising and Aunt Baby, were so very close that they were like triplets of different ages. Sharing everything sisters share and loving each other so completely, their bond remained throughout life and it has never been broken, much more now that they have all passed away.

Papa met my mom in her office, where she worked as the pretty and efficient secretary of a person who would later be one of Cagayan de Oro's mayors. On January 7, forty-two years ago, my mom and dad got married. While growing up and now that I am a married man myself, Mama and Papa showed me a kind of love that is unconditional and the eternal type that poets write about and regular folks hope to attain someday. Once my mom had focused on the family business, she was always where Papa is, and it was a relationship of love, work and fun and supporting each other. It was a joint apostolate for the “Let There Be Light” Community and the God the Father Community for them.

What Mom offered to her family and friends is a love so earnest and unending that absolutely nothing could shake its tenacity or endurance. I know that even if Mom didn't like something that we did, it meant nothing compared to how much she loved us. She was the center of our home, and she was a pillar for her relatives and close friends. The power of that love overcame any kind of adversity, thus letting us know we mattered more than everything and anything else.

I can especially remember my sister Magi and I struggling in our early grades, and Mom helped us with constant patience until we understood Math, English, and eventually everything else; I don't know what I would have done without her quiet and graceful intelligence.

Even during my teens and early 20's life, my friends were always welcome in the house and they knew it. My mother would make us snacks and we'd hang out watching TV, playing basketball, or listening to records. Mom's love for us extended to our friends and then eventually to when in-laws came into the family.

Mom always opened that umbrella of love for them; and Papa Jun, Mama Precy, Hans and Helen were never considered anything but part of the family, and it was well reciprocated. Her love for my wife, Heidi was so seamless and Mom loved her as if she was her own daughter. When we had Annika and Angela, Mom was thrilled to become a grandma, and she cherished that role very much and she doted on Nika and Gela and marveled at everything that they did.

Mom had been sickly, but she was completely unafraid, often radiant with happiness, beaming at all the people she loved. At whatever state her heart was in, she used every last bit of her strength so we could be together and be with her just a bit longer.

There is much more I could talk about Mom, but none of it would be enough to capture her amazing zest for life and immense capacity to love. She was struck with thyroid problem that weakened her heart and she was a diabetic. Increasingly weakened by the disease, Mom never let that stop her from loving us, cooking or overseeing meals for our Sunday lunch and dinner, being a part of the planning sessions for our family business, or giving us that smile when we needed it.

We all know how much pain she endured, but we also are buoyed by the spirit of her love and faith in us despite the odds against her. She was there for us whenever we needed to talk, to get a hug, or to just be together. Whenever we had a problem, Magi and I knew Mom would listen and give us the best advice. Now we feel a great void with her gone, but I know she can still be there for us if we shut our eyes and remember that she is with us always.

Mom, I love you and miss you but your smile is burned into my heart and soul. Papa, Magi, Heidi, your grand daughters, Annika Michelle and Angela Marionne and the rest of your family and friends are all so fortunate to have had you in their lives and your impact on us and the strength of your love will never be forgotten.

The last days with Mom in the hospital taught me so many lessons and made me aware of so many things that to the last moment, I know that Mom is ever there, guiding me. And now, I truly believe that my mom is in a better place free from all her pain and struggles. I wish her peace and happiness until we will all meet again one day.

To all of you, our relatives, friends, acquaintances and partners - Thank you all for your comfort and support, we greatly appreciate it. It truly warms our hearts to know we have each other for Mama.

Mama, go with God. Fly, Mom, fly!

________________________________
Eulogy for Felicitas T. Mendoza
offered by Al Michael T. Mendoza
March 27 2009, Greenhills Memorial Park
Cagayan de Oro City

photos in explore

Flickr labs have been hard at work creating a way to show some of the most awesome content on Flickr. It is called interestingness.

Besides being a five syllable word suitable for tongue twisters, it is also an amazing new Flickr Feature.

There are lots of elements that make something 'interesting' (or not) on Flickr. Where the clickthroughs are coming from; who comments on it and when; who marks it as a favorite; its tags and many more things which are constantly changing. Interestingness changes over time, as more and more fantastic content and stories are added to Flickr.

Interestingness is what Flickr calls the criteria used for selecting which photos are shown in Explore. All photos are given an Interestingness "score" that can also be used to sort any image search on Flickr. The top 500 photos ranked by Interestingness are shown in Explore. Interestingness rankings are calculated automatically by a secret computer algorithm. The algorithm is often referred to by name as the Interestingness algorithm.

Although the algorithm is secret, Flickr has stated that many factors go into calculating Interestingness including: a photo's tags, how many groups the photo is in, views, favorites, where click-throughs are coming from, who comments on a photo and when, and more. The velocity of any of those components is a key factor. For example, getting 20 comments in an hour counts much higher than getting 20 comments in a week.

Here are my 21 photos that made it to Explore so far.

1. kiss me in the rain 2. when seeds fall to the ground 3. get well soon mama fely 4. reach for the light 5. mas azul que esto 6. this knotted preview 7. on my way to you 8. yellow for this valentine 9. day 12: limited prospects 10. day 05: banished light 11. alphabetic collection - W 12. alphabetic collection - U 13. alphabetic collection - I 14. all is said and done 15. alphabetic collection - C 16. colors of the season 17. happy birthday annika 18. the heart is resilient 19. one day i'll fly away 20. ablazed this way 21. or so it seems

time for smart blah blah

It's a long time I've read or heard something like this. Thank you, Mike Banos. Never realized that I crave some mind tickles. Prepare to leap when you face the sarchasm!


Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words.

1. Coffee (n), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj), describes a condition in which you absent-mindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n), (back by popular demand) The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:

1. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
3. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease.
9. Karmageddon (n): it’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

"Heidi's Drive" Photo by Mike Mendoza

the early mornings

The idea came from Mike. He wants to avoid crowds of the "gathered faithful" on Sundays. And he wants to avoid priests with bad homilies who run a speech like a political rally.

But I laid down the rule that our family must get to church once a week. So as if inspired by an original intervention, he woke us up early one Saturday morning and we attended the Holy Mass in the Xavier University Chapel.

And thus began our very own family tradition. We all loved it. I love the idea of waking up and really seeing the morning and starting it with the family walking together to the chapel. The girls are also excited because Saturday mornings after the Mass mean a breakfast in any of the restaurants or hotels around the city that are awake to offer a meal.

And Mike gets his solemn Mass celebrated with a handful of people in a familiar chapel, in the campus of his boyhood, a priest who is from the not so young breed of beating-around-the-bush orators and also from the not so old breed of holier than thou clerics, and a quick straight-to-its-business liturgy since there are no out-of-tune choirs that disrupt the prayers with their songs.

Oh I've stopped being righteous about the reasons of the family and I've stopped being defensive about not really attending the Sunday Mass - but the schedule works for us - it brings us together - the time and the place give us the needed experience of the sacred and the holy - and we've actually looked forward to doing it every Saturday. I think those simple considerations matter most to me.

And I've started working on a little project to celebrate our Saturdays - with the permission of Fr. Nil Guillemette, the Jesuit presider of these Eucharistic celebrations, I am posting his homily reflections in a simple blog -

The Early Mornings

as a token of my appreciation and my own way of celebration of what it all means to me.


http://theearlymornings.blogspot.com/

gloomy days

Photo by Mike Mendoza

raining. pouring. persisting.

Mike and I shot the ominous black clouds hanging over Malasag Hill last January 2. We never had an inkling it would lead to torrential rains for days and for displacing families when the water level rose and flooded houses in some areas of the city.

Mike and I again went out into the night last January 10, watching and waiting for the moon, purported to be on its brightest and biggest that night. After two hours of wondering if the clouds covering it would give us a lucid window, the moon shone above our heads and Mike and I snapped our pictures. But only for a very few minutes, for clouds once again covered the moon as fast as it let us into an opportunity to click. We also didn't have an idea that this would lead into another series of heavy rain and strong winds all over the city and its environs!

Three days into the torrents and here is the Philippines:


Where are Mindanao and the Visayas islands? Incredible! For the first time in my twelve years in Cagayan de Oro, I am seeing powerful winds sway the branches of the mango trees in our garden and rattle the french windows from their hinges.

Hand in hand with blasting radio commentators are my mother's invitation for the family to spend the next few days in Davao City, where the rains are not as bad. Some friends losing their houses AND some friends working on relief operations to assist those affected by the disaster all around. Private sector organizations rounding up donations AND politicians trying to be visible for election points.

Students preparing for major examinations AND students glad to stay at home because of the rain. People scaring each other with calamity stories growing bigger by the minute AND communication companies enjoying the endless forwarding of messages all over the country. Worrying over the family pet getting wet in his doghouse from the rain shower AND dead farm animals floating along the town streets.

Thinking that the people behind the miserable drainage system of the city must be damned AND relieved that the non-locals who barraged into the city and set up settlements in areas beside rivers must finally decide to go back where they came from so the city will be cleaned. (I so totally avoid starting on those denuded forests AND irresponsibility of corporations.)

Finally - I worry that I just am not able to capture rain perfectly in my camera AND praying that this rain will grow silent soon so life will return to normal.

Image from Google Earth

theater by the harbor

Oh what a delight it is to know that one of my photos has been selected for inclusion in the newly released sixth edition of the Schmap Sydney Guide! Taken during my Australian trip last 2006, I never had any indication that a few years after, that shot will return to that country continent to grace one of its city guides.


Sydney Opera House Opera Theatre

Seating 1,547, this is home of the renowned Opera Australia and Australian Ballet. With an outstanding repertoire of both new and old, both companies stage several productions, running on consecutive night, around four times per year. The theater has a wooden ceiling, which enhances the acoustics. It has a proscenium stage and a screen above it onto which English subtitles can be projected for performances sung in their original language.


Here is that page:

www.schmap.com/sydney/entertainment_opera/p=38556/i=38556_21.jpg


This shot was taken during a walk with the city mayor of Cagayan de Oro and other local officials and business leaders when we went to Australia and New Zealand for a trade mission. It was one of those days when the sun was kind to tourists like us.

I entitled this photo "It Stands There."


Flickr Photo by This Girl

landing on the moon

I admit that I have been remiss of my blogging for a while. I was even afraid that like the past year, my zeal for doing this online journal has died too. But I think I am ready now to start 2009 with a little bit of good news.

A story came out in PC World online and one of my photos was featured.


Fantastic Flickr Photographers

Millions of photographs are posted on the photography site Flickr, but a small subset of them demonstrate a leap of technique and imagination. We showcase some of these interesting artists.

by Kathleen Cullen, PC World


The page where my photo above is featured is here:

http://www.pcworld.com/article/155808-12/fantastic_flickr_photographers.html

The photo, "Wish Someone Could", is my shot of a morning moon and a bird flying by, camera settings with the help of Mike. And for its post-processing, I used some of the free textures available in the Internet to create the picture I have imagined. As taking photos and processing them is a pleasure in itself, this opportunity to be noticed and invited into articles like this is indeed a feather in the cap.


Flickr Photo by This Girl