daughters, or didn't i know

It is a Sunday night and Nika declares she's Group Leader. And she is on the verge of tears.

I promised and promised her but it's not really true. Now everyone in class will call her irresponsible because I haven't really helped finalize the details of her research work. And she's Group Leader.

They will study birds. And she will bring them to the Aviary. Really. It's her idea. And it's only her group that's doing a field research. She informed her group mates her Dad will drive them there. And in the Trooper, not the Sorento. Her mom will prepare the materials. And maybe she'll throw a few hotdogs on sticks too.

The Dad hears none of it. Tears. The Mom has not the time. Tears.

Then it all pours like an avalanche: her classmates do not like her. They push her around and will not listen when she would talk to them. They say she's a noisy disturbance. They bully her around. She is a third grader thrown into a class of fourth, fifth and sixth graders. And she's Group Leader.

There is a lot more. But mothers, who are also secretary generals, graduate students, hopeless dieters, Quadra Pop crazies, struggling cooks, unknown speechwriters and music lovers - they sometimes blot out the talk and the whining.

Then I watch her hunched on the chair. Not the proud first born that I have, but with the look of someone who is already beaten before the race has begun. I cannot let that happen to her.

I wait when the crying stopped a little. Then I go to her and ask her what was needed to be done. Yes I can do this. If I can take battling event sponsors and beat staggering deadlines, then I must do this. Especially this.

We agree. I will prepare the research format. The driver will take her and her group. In the Trooper, not the Revo. There will be snacks. There will be a digital camera. She'll even have sunblock, don't you forget. And I promise to myself that I will talk to her teacher.

She nods. She finally smiles. I ruffle her hair. We move to the family room. I feel something fierce inside me that it seems to fill my heart.

We play Blue Moon in the keyboards together. I play badly, but Nika guides me and waits till I hit the right note. She's Group Leader.